As regular ‘readers’ of this blog will know, I don’t go in much for discussion of the philosophy and practice of ‘real’ femdom. This blog doesn’t try to be realistic; it’s just supposed to be fantasy and fun.
But at the risk of trespassing on Paltego’s turf I do have a question to the ‘community’ to see what they think and it is this: is femdom porn (or any kind of kinky porn, perhaps) just more interesting than ‘regular’ porn?
This question has occurred to me for a few reasons. One is that we are coming up to this blog’s ten-year anniversary (more on that in a couple of weeks' time) and I have been looking back through my own witterings. The other is that, for various reasons, I have been revisiting some magazines that were my first proper femdom porn – Cruella, Goddess, Vixen and Mistress – and reminding myself how extraordinarily exciting I found them to be, in my early 20s. I hung on every word of their stories, could barely read more than a sentence or two at a time without having to put them down, swooning with excitement and savouring the anticipation of where the story would go next.
And that’s the point: femdom porn (the sort I like, anyway) tells a story. There’s a lot that can happen in that story: fear, dread, forgiveness, revenge, cruelty, false hope, humiliation, trickery etc etc. I spend a lot of time trying to think up new ways in which the ladies in my captions and stories can be cruel, preferably with an unexpected twist, and from time to time I succeed. I’ve been doing that for ten years on this blog and I am not finished yet. I’m not saying every caption or story I put up is a new idea – far from it, there are some well-worn themes – but some are new and I certainly seek out and value novelty. Mainstream porn seems to lack that element… fundamentally, it’s about the sex act. There are various inventive ways in which one can lead up to the sex act (it doesn’t have to be a plumber coming around to fix her pipes) and then there are some variations in the sex act itself, to be sure: different holes, combinations, positions. But that does not seem to close the story-telling gap – the femdom porn I like won’t usually feature any sexual acts at all, it is all ‘story’. And it should have unexpected twists and inventions that make the reader think 'I never thought of that', if it’s good.
I am raising this question about porn, but it applies to femdom more generally. Although some of the pro-dommes I have sessioned with allow a 'happy release' at the end, not all do and it is certainly not the main focus of the session. That might be humiliation, control, pain: again, a good domme (and there are so many wonderful ones) constructs a narrative, a story.
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| Femdom
porn image. There's a lot going on here. One could write 5-6
different stories about this at least. Why is he in the cage, how did
she get him in there? What is going to happen to the collared guy
lying on the floor? She's wearing boots: is she going to kick him,
stomp him, make him lick them...? There's a cane, on the couch. What is the significance of the steel box to the
right - is someone else in there already, is one of these two going in
there? Is the box a 'next level' punishment after the cage? She is looking at us - so are we there? Are we next? There is so much here for
the imagination. |
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| And
mainstream porn (from the first page of a search just with the word 'porn'). I can see they're having a lot of fun. And
again, one could tell stories of what happened before and what might
happen next - but not stories specifically inspired by elements of the
picture. I can understand that other people find 'mainstream' sex as exciting as I find femdom to be, but the porn itself, the fantasy itself just seems a lot less... interesting. |
To make it a bit more personal: my own sexuality is 100% kinky. That is, I don’t get excited at all by thoughts of vanilla sex. If I watch a mainstream porn video, I can get a bit into the suggestive looks and flirting in the initial five minutes, but then the remainder of it – the grinding and licking and thrusting and so on – does nothing for me. But I am absolutely obsessed with femdom fantasy, as the ten years of this blog demonstrates. I know that some others like both mainstream and femdom, so maybe they are better placed to answer the question than I am.
I’m porn-addicted, in fact – I can
spend many hours at a time on the Internet looking for and writing femdom
stuff, I can lie in bed for hours constructing elaborate scenarios and so on… I won’t provide sweaty details. But I guess what I am wondering, is: if I did
not have this kink, would I be as interested in ‘normal’ sexual fantasies as I am in femdom fantasies; interested in the same way? If
only my inclination were that way – if I were magically transformed by some
kind of psychotherapy so that instead of fantasising about being humiliated and
punished by women, I just fantasised about having sex with them? Would I seek out and construct equally elaborate fantasies? Could I have put up 5000 captioned images about people having sex, instead of the 5000 or so I have published on my more
twisted and evil themes? Would I enjoy looking back through them and reminding myself of what I came up with as much as I do?
It doesn’t seem to me that I could or would. There just doesn’t seem to be enough going on in ‘normal’ sex. I certainly feel that if I were 'normal' I would have lost something because the vanilla imagination is much more limited, even though there would obviously also be advantages (less need for secrecy, better integration of my sexuality and my personal relationships). But is that actually true, or does that just reflect the limits on my imagination created by my existing sexual orientation?
Well I am sure that I can speak for many of your followers in saying how much I look forward to your next batch of fantasies - and those recycled ones which are always worth revisiting. One can fantasise about having heterosexual (or even homosexual) sex with a beautiful man or woman but once the act is performed, that is the end. Femdom porn, as exemplified by Servitor lead on on to "what happens next" scenarios which for us aficionados can be very exciting and can lead on to even wilder fantasies. Keep giving us those lovely fantasies, please.
ReplyDeleteMany thanks, Melissa.
DeleteOh, don't worry. Nothing in the above was intended to suggest that I will be stopping any time soon. Like a piece of gritty chewing gum, flattened on the bottom of the sole of a boot, I .... well, I won't explore the simile in detail.
True about vanilla sex ending with the act. In my experience an actual session with a domme can end equally quickly with the act, though. I've occasionally produced captions gently mocking the way, following an orgasm, the conversation instantly shifts from the 'superior mistress and disgusting little worm' vibe to 'so how have you been - did you manage to get a holiday this year?'. Although of course I remain thoroughly respectful, even in post-session conversation. Plus, I'm often not allowed a 'happy ending'. That's the nice thing about chastity play... the foreplay need never end.
My very best wishes
S
And of course there is a lot of humour. I find myself smiling, if not laughing at some of your captions. Not laughing out loud of course, that wouldn't be allowed and might be thought disrespectful
DeleteWell indeed. Femdom is no laughing matter, as my SO occasionally sternly reminds me - except, of course, when it is because she says so.
DeleteBest wishes
S
Yes, absolutely! There are endless layers to F/m (power, control, greed, mental/emotional masochism/sadism...on and on.)
ReplyDeleteIndeed. Layers. Like an onion, or an ogre. Perhaps there's something wrong with a universe in which there are many more ways to be cruel to someone than there are to provide sexual pleasure. But it's ever so much fun.
DeleteMany thanks for your comment, Watson. Give my best wishes to Sherlock and (more importantly) Irene.
Best wishes
S
Yes , agree absolutely. It's like savouring a 5 course meal vs grabbing a quick takeaway of whatever's there.
ReplyDeleteWell, I'd like to think so. A little faces lapping for the hors d'oeuvres, then an appetiser of bondage and humiliation before the satisfying main course bent over the whipping bench. Some light foot worship to follow and then round it all off squealing through a good pegging. You can't get that at the McDonalds drive-thru.
DeleteBest wishes
S
'Face slapping', even, although 'faces lapping' sounds all right too, if done in a manner that doesn't break Rule 18.
DeleteAs a purveyor of a variety of different genres, I can say that having a story certainly ups the appeal of certain porn.
ReplyDeletePorn essentially is insertion fiction, the viewer/reader is meant to desire to be a part of the fiction. This does not necessarily require a structure or narrative, but it becomes easier to immerse yourself in the fantasy when the character makes the same decisions that the viewer would make. In cases of mainstream porn, this relies on the fact that their clientelle are most likely horny, and would partake of the sex. However, this fails largely when either the actors are not attractive to the viewer or if they fail to act in a similar way.
The loose premise of the mainstream: pool cleaner is tempted by a woman; person finds alternative ways of compensating for pizza delivery or secretary seeks to make up for poor work performance, the clear decision that they expect someone to make is to indulge in the offer, especially as they are currently seeking sexual release by browsing porn.
Other mainstream pornography is voyeuristic, you play the role of an onlooker. To continue watching is the choice they expect you to make, by having some women engaging in serious lesbiotic activities or with a strip-tease. There can be some brilliant creations here, but often they provide no greater stimulation than regular film and tv with sexual aspects, such as Game of Thrones or anything with Scarlett Johansson in, so the motive for creation is low.
A branch of voyeur porn which is considered more on the kinky side is cuckold fiction, but this doesn't appeal to the mainstream as much as the everyday viewer is expected not to react passively to their partner sexing it with someone else. Cuckolding couples well with femdom because of the notion of the female being able to act freely and the male being incapable of protest. Cuckolding doesn't have to be femdom though, it can come from a variety of motives.
This is distinct from POV porn, as that is just a delivery technique more than a style.
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Femdom and it's relatives are for men that would respond to instruction in porn with compliance, the decisions are obvious as they are largely dictated. It can't appeal in this way to someone who wouldn't comply, as they cannot immerse themselves in the experience. This constriction of the choices of the viewer (as in they will imagine themselves acting as the on-screen sub would do because they want to follow the orders too) means that the story can have more layers. You take no risks with elaboration and development because you are confident that the viewer will still be acting as they want them to. This allows for variety, for exploration and for expression, as long as the common theme remains intact, that the character of the domme has authority.
DeleteThe issue with the opposite of femdom lies in that now the male has authority, he instructs and his decision is important to the narrative. You have to rely on the horny audience to act as the guy does, and invariably this comes down to "Look woman tied up, I should penis her". Any other action has to be explicitly related to sexual urges or falls flat. There is no insertion. This restricts the story in a vast way, so all become very similar, which isn't necessarily a problem for immersive viewers but is for connoisseurs.
Femdom also appeals to the voyeur, you can watch femdom and appreciate the dominant aspects of her character, and if you feel no urges to act as the sub is acting, it enforces the viewers masculinity and ego, adding to the experience.
Voyeurism isn't an appeal for the submissive woman. There's no joy in watching someone else have control over people whilst yourself being incapable of making a human woman devote her existence to you. It creates a feeling of inferiority, and it isn't a rewarding experience. There's no need to waste time making stories if your viewers either don't care or don't exist.
Celebrity or rule 34 topics are based on pre existing attractions to people and often just borrow heavily from other stories. Often too this type of porn is created by the viewer. It never goes public but is extremely effective for the perso
writing it as they can definitely relate to it. Parody porn would be in this category.
Other niche desires like eproctophilia or foot fetish are simply sources of arousal, you seek this porn out, it isn't plastered on banner ads on dodgy websites. This means that the audience has some key traits already known. So it becomes basic porn with different cues.
Servitor, as a creator of femdom porn you must surely understand that your audience can be reliex upon to act as you would expect no matter the premise. Wife, stranger, prostitute or lifelong friend; if they command, your audience can relate to the sub, and as such you can share your creations without needing to consider other people's personalities. Ironically it is the freedom which allows femdom to flourish.
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Many thanks indeed for your extensive and insightful comment, Mr A.
DeleteYes, that makes a lot of sense. I'll resist the obvious smutty joke at the phrase 'insertion porn' but it is certainly true that a femdom scenario can be narrated to a male, in a way that a scenario involving the male as actor cannot. I doubt many women feel themselves represented or involved, as the ladies in my captions or stories. And in the captions, especially, the text is often said by the lady to the unseen reader himself: which would clearly be much more limited if that reader were in charge. Although obviously there can be excellent femsub porn directed at males, one rarely sees captions, presumably because she would just be saying "What would you like me to do, master?". Equivalently, although I don't know what sort of porn real dominant women would like, I suspect that the rather arty and usually context-free images (often black and white) out there of fit young males writhing in bondage or ready for oral service are more the sort of thing than my convoluted efforts. I suspect they would react to most of mine by thinking 'Well, why would I want to do that?'
In some ways, maybe it's a little like the classic stereotypical romantic novel, in which a somewhat submissive woman is swept off her feet by the dashing romantic hero. There's a lot to be said for not being in charge, from a narrative perspective.
That said, I have seen femsub stories that do have a similar complex narrative of cruelty piled upon cruelty, with little sex involved - for instance involving ponygirls. I don't know whether actual male doms enjoy such stories, though, or whether like me most readers (male or female) are there to identify with the feelings of the 'poor' abused girls.
Not that I'm allowed to read such things, obviously, but one can stumble across things while shopping on the Internet...
I do indeed expect and require my readership to do as they are told; and indeed roundly insult and humiliate them wherever possible. Most of them deserve little better, but they keep coming back, the loathsome little maggots. But your comments deserve better appreciation, so thank you again for that insightful contribution.
Best wishes
S
Original commenter here, thanks for your reply.
DeleteTrue there exists sadistic fantasies but they tend to be in what are often referres to as 'the darker corners' of the web, but I see them too as an insertion fantasy, just for a slightly disturbed audience.
As anyone with a browser knows, there is porn for everything, and the ease of making and distributing content in the digital age with little to no personal expense and a huge bucket load of anonymity allows for the sharing of weird sexual desires with no risk of damaging social standing.
This of course allows for the 48 chapter epic poems of the unlikely relationship between a younger Angela Merkel and Nigel Farage which have little market appeal, but can be appreciated maybe by one single other user somewhere out there. But similar to a point I made earlier, you have to seek this stuff out usually, a generic scroll through the recommended videos on a popular masturbatory website will find you no such treats.
Your mention of the romantic fiction, the Pride and Prejudices or Lady Chatterley's lovers of the world is related to the word choice of insertion
It isn't actually an intended pun, it is a term I have heard to explain the success of poorly written fiction like James Bond, Harry Potter, Twilight or the Da Vinci Code. The main character acts as a surrogate for the reader/viewer and the story can be experienced through their own happenings. This would also explain why fandoms for such things are so cult-like yet the things themselves are easily recognised as being of lower quality by those who do not identify with the main character. The whole thing is sociologically very interesting but probably not why anyone is on this website.
Back to the erotic stuff, femsub captions do frequently exist, although the dialogue is usually short or repetitive. Mostly it is a reply to an action or event with the reader left to further the story in their imagination. This of course isn't ideal for people with terrible imaginations or lazy people, so again the audience doesn't materialise.
A lot of very fascinating issues are raised with pornography but resist discussion in most polite conversations, which is a shame in my opinion. Masturbation is the truest of unifying hobbies, so everyone should be able to contribute to the debate.
Many thanks, Mr A. Indeed, it's a topic that deserves further study although regrettably the hang-ups of our society would probably make it difficult for the holder of a PhD in pornography studies to conduct a job market presentation on their thesis.
DeleteThat said, academia has become so fragmented and desperate for novelty that there is an academic version of Rule 34 - if it exists there is a '- Studies' department of it. So there's hope.
My very best wishes
S
Your average BDSMer is more imaginative and more intelligent than say your average swinger. Thus its no surprise when we start making scenarios and thinking about feelings and putting ourselves in the place of the dominant or the submissive or both. So you are exactly right we are more dramtatic.
ReplyDeleteFemsup
Yes, that's certainly what I'd like to think, Femsup. Femdom-oriented males are simply smarter than those without that kink (perhaps because we are intelligent enough to see what is coming to the world, and adapt our sexuality to enjoy it). While still being useless morons, compared to the superior sex, obviously.
DeleteI am certainly more 'dramatic' in session, shrieking my head off at the slightest sense of actual pain. 'Annoying' would be another word. At least one domme (the wonderful Eleise de Lacy) seemed to get quite genuinely irritated at my nervous laughter in session, telling me off for 'snickering'. Somewhat counterproductively, as being told off by Mistress Eleise is a submissive's dream.
Best wishes and thanks for your continuing active participation here, Femsup.
S
I enjoy your posts because they are so imaginative and sometimes quite surprising. I prefer those based on real life rather than fantasies and especially female led marriages.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the great work, Servitor.
Zoe
Many thanks, Zoe. I enjoy your comments on them too. One could probably debate for a while which of my postings is more realistic and which more fantastical. I like to think that all of them are realistic somewhere, in some better-run universe than ours.
DeleteBest wishes
S
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteShame you deleted, but thank you for commenting. If you'd rather your name simply didn't appear on the blog, let me know as I can delete permanently.
DeleteBest wishes
S