Tuesday, March 28, 2017

The wrongs of man

are self-evident but can be sorted out by the smack of firm government in the right hands.

She sounds like she knows what she's doing.

Another day, another dollar.  Well... not a whole dollar, obviously.  That's just a saying.  In fact, they only spend a penny each time.

Huh! I'd like to see him do better.

Maybe try another topic of conversation? I mean - you got her attention. That's a good start.

See, there he is while she's telling him how upset she was about his thoughtless gift and all he can think about is how his lungs are burning.  That's what men are like. It's a good thing there's femdom to help set us right, that's all I can say.

Friday, March 24, 2017


Try hopping back and forth from one leg to the other. That can help a lot.

Well, OK, as long as it's safe, sane, consensual and well-deserved. Or any two of those, anwyay.

People say that to keep up a diet you have to be really strict with yourself, but I've found that someone else being strict works just as well.

While you're down there, you notice Simon's shoes are quite badly scuffed - and there's a client meeting later. What do you do? (a) say nothing, (b) let him know or (c) give them a quick polish yourself, as you're there anyway. Take your time, there are no 'wrong' answers.

Well, as long as she remembers to keep it charged this time.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Pitiful, really

...but it's all I've got.

I once dated a girl who said she wanted me to be a stallion in the bedroom.  So I got all kitted up, you know in reins and harness, and when she came into the room I handed her spurs and the riding whip and she just screamed, slapped me round the face and left. How humiliating. Happy days...

Former boyfriends... bane of my life.

The first time a domme gave me a golden shower and ordered me to lick it up, She asked me what the taste was like.  I replied 'tart' and things got very painful, very quickly.   (Non-British readers won't get that: don't worry about it, move on).

I took a personality test once and scored a perfect zero.

She's lying because she knows I like the contempt.  Really, she has to keep swigging at that bottle to take her mind off the hot action in front of her.  Otherwise she'd be overpowered with lust, at the sight of an overweight middle-aged sub, desperately jerking away on the floor by her boots.  Women just can't resist that kind of thing.

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Sometimes you need a little help

Hi there!  Amdigames in-game help, Sara here!  What can I help you with?

Er… no, sir, I guess all our male helpers are busy with other callers.  And also, that’s just a little sexist. I am entirely familiar with all our –

Sure, OK.  No problem.  So: what game have you been playing?

Virtual Girlfriend 3.0?  Oh-kay!  Let me just load that up for you.  And are you playing the parentally blocked version, or the adult edition?  Oh-kay.

So… menu screen… full adult.  Do you have kind of sex toys plugged in or are you just using…

Your hand?  What do you mean, you're using your – oh I see. No, I actually meant what game controller are you using.  I’ll just put mouse and keyboard.

OK, and can you tell me which virtual girl you chose?  Oooh, Suki! OK. 

So what’s the problem?

She won’t what, sorry? ‘Put out’?

Oh, I see.  OK, hold on. What level are you on?  Cos like for the first few levels, you’re just wooing them and it’s only on level three that they –

Level six?  OK, that’s weird.  She should be putting out everything she's got by then, no question.  And did she, er…, 'put out' on the earlier levels?  No?

OK.  Let’s see.  I’ll just run through a quick script to shortcut through to … OK, so I’m on level six, and I’ve poured her a drink and Suki says… what does Suki say, hang on...

Suki says she wants to run her hot tongue up and down my throbbing love piston.  She also says her pussy is soaking with carnal desire. 

You got the same dialogue? No? What does she say on yours?

She’s ‘got a headache’?  Hmm… That’s really not supposed to happen. Is your avatar still wearing clothes?  OK, try dropping your pants.  Let her see your, erm… ‘throbbing love piston’.

She's what?  She's laughing?  What kind of laughing? Laughing funny, or laughing hysterically, or laughing like - I dunno.  How's she laughing?

She's 'laughing like the girls always laugh'?  OK.  You know, sir, I'm not sure what you mean by that.  But I think it sounds like Suki might be a little glitched there.  Maybe we could try a different girl?  Can you go back to the menu page?

Yeah, just choose any of them.  You should see 24.

Only three?  OK, well, just choose one of them, I guess.

Amber?  OK, sure.  So, you click on Amber and you should see her phone number.  And then you’re gonna call her, and Amber’s gonna get all hot just at the sound of your voice and then –

She hung up on you?

OK, well you can still visit her apartment.  You know – you can get these stealth skills, so you can sneak into girls’ apartments and hide in their closets as long as your stealth skill is at level 3 or above, so –

 - your stealth skill is at level 19?  Wow.  I didn’t know it went up that high.  You must really like sneaking around in girls’ erm… anyway!  That’s great. So – let’s break into Amber’s apartment and see if we can surprise her undressing or something.  (euw)

You in? OK?  So what’s Amber doing?

What do you mean, she’s not there? She has to be there.  She’s just a few lines of code in a game, she doesn’t get to decide to go out and do something else…

Nowhere to be seen? Are you sure? 

OK, well look sir, I’m really sorry.  I don’t know what the heck has gone wrong with your game, but we can send you a voucher that you can use to purchase any of our – what?

She left a pair of stinky trainers and her bin is full of used tampons? OK, well like I said sir, I’m really sorry that this has happened and –

Fine? What do you mean, it’s fine?



Sir I’m still online here and I can hear you.  If you wouldn’t mind putting the phone down before you… before you finish what you’re doing I’d appreciate it.  Only we’re not allowed to terminate the call ourselves you see, and –

Oh gross. Oh I so hate my job.




Oh, hi?  So… Sara still here… Amdigames?  Can I take it you’re now OK with your game?

Great.  And... ermm… I have to ask, were you satisfied with the way this call went?

‘Entirely satisfied’.  Yeah, I kind of guessed that.  OK, well, I’ll say goodbye then and … go off and have a shower or something.

Wait!  I did not say that!  You are NOT to think about me having a shower, because –

Damn, you’ve gone.

EUUUGGHHH!  That was so....  Oh, YUK!

Hey Tony, can I take a five minute break?  I need to wash.  Like, really thoroughly.  Then I’d like to go back to the MMO section, if I can?  I miss the days of telling nerds they need more strength to lift their orc-cleavers.

Friday, March 17, 2017

Servility costs nothing

(although finding someone to whom to be servile can run to several hundred pounds an hour, in my experience)

This is something many men still have to learn.  Just because a woman chooses to wear something sexy, you can't assume she's doing so for your pleasure.

Any fundamentalist religious types who don't believe in female supremacy might care to meditate on why the Divine Being provided males with testicles in such a handy container, and then wired them stright into the pain centres.  Don't you think She's given us a bit of a clue, there?

Mis-statement I'd like to forget?

One day he's going to have to give up the thing that matters most to him. Her.

Yeah, the usual order.

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Simply divine, darling

It's always such a relief when finally the boxes are all unpacked, there's a chain the right length in each room, all the pillories and cages have been assembled and you can get back to ordinary married life, for goodness sake.

She's always taken roleplay very seriously. They tried medical fetish play once and it didn't turn out well.

Making a decision of my own free will, to do exactly whatever she has told me, immediately, is the secret to a happy life I find.

Oh, you've already promised to honour and obey him, so adding love to the mix doesn't change much.

The truth will not set you free.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Suitable treatment

Ah... the second childhood. I'm looking forward to that.


Therapy can be painful.

Quite a therapeutic theme today.  Using boys for anger management makes a lot of sense: it can work off a lot of tension and no one who matters gets hurt.

Little does she know I'm a humiliation freak as well as a service-oriented submissive, so being despised is just all part of the fun!

Hmmm... just noticed that my favourite Tumblr cuandolasmujeresmanden has just disappeared.  Damn! I know there's about a billion femdom image reposting Tumblrs but cuando somehow just managed precisely to match my own perverted tastes .  And only posted high quality pictures too.  First 'Femdom Times' goes into hibernation for ever and now this.  Does Tumblr close down 'adult' blogs?  I must say, I can't quite see the point, given that there'd still be 999,999,999 of them left.

Grrrr....   If anyone has a particular recommendation feel free to share it in the comments.  No blogs with nekkid women, granny porn or really icky things being done to men's genitals and shown in close-up please.  Just good healthy bondage and discipline.  And humiliation, contempt and cruelty.

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Deliver us from freedom

It's a small town, so the walk of shame afterwards will only take you 15 minutes or so.

I had a very traditional upbringing - strict discipline, cold showers, that kind of thing.  It cost about £450 but it was worth every penny and I'm going back in a few weeks for another one.

Goodness, if you can't trust your cleaner with that sort of trivial responsibility, why would you even let her into the house?

Ahhh male doms.  I think male doms are just great, in their proper place.

Perhaps you'd better approach the bench.