Saturday, July 16, 2016

It is to laugh

As you know, this blog occasionally takes a light-hearted approach to our beloved theme of femdom, gently poking fun at some of its clichés and foibles.  And of course, the blog also deals with topics such as testicle-crushing, burial alive, betrayal, murder, blackmail, torture and forced lobotomies - but always with a tongue firmly in someone's cheek.  In almost precisely the words of the late, great Bob Monkhouse: "People laughed when I told them I was planning to publish a humorous femdom blog. They're not laughing now."

I know of three other blogs that also poke fun in an affectionate way at our shared obsession, so here are some links in case any of you haven't come across them yet:

Editor Domme has a particular focus on femdom captions, handing out merciless correction to those which transgress the rules of grammar, abuse homonyms or lack any basic coherence.  The wise Editrix keeps all us captioners on our toes, as awfull punishments await those she catches.*

Much like mine, the Tiresome Sex Tropes blog consists almost entirely of overused, tired femdom stereotypes.  Unlike mine, it takes issue with them, rather than merely doing them to death.  After all, do we really want to spend all our time looking at pictures of young beautiful women wearing leather, latex or starched white blouses, captioned to be saying menacing things?  Hmm? I mean, doesn't that get boring after a while?  Wouldn't we rather look at... I dunno, scenic shots of colourful markets in developing countries?  Anyway, I am proud to have been sufficiently tiresome to feature twice already on the TST blog (and I'm only getting started).

Finally, Poorly Dressed Dominatrix is a blog featuring images of... oh, just try to guess.  Perhaps a little crueller than the others**, but I think the mocking is gently affectionate. Plus, the majority of images it features look more like general glamour models who have put on a corset (on one memorable occasion, upside-down), picked up a whip and tried to look fierce for the camera***, rather than real pro-dommes who, after all, are doing their best to provide an essential service in often difficult circumstances - and always look perfect.  It hasn't been updated for a couple of months, so perhaps there's no more bad fetish fashion around any more. Job done?

I think all three blogs are great and I check on them regularly.

Right.  Now, if you've visited all three, I expect you're ready for some images of immaculately dressed dominatrices, each image accompanied by a witty caption expressing an entirely original femdom notion in perfect English.  

Sadly, I only have these to offer:

* Splendidly, the existence of the Editor Domme blog means that from now on I can always claim that any spelling or grammatical error committed here is a deliberate attempt to attract the wrath of the stern Editrix.  And those committed before her blog even started, erm, were probably just deliberately anticipating such fun!

** Editor Domme is of course occasionally quite cruel to caption writers.  But that's just fine.  Ma'am.

*** I'll confess I do actually quite like this look.  As long as they don't try to do that thing of looking fierce by drawing back their lips to snarl at the camera.  Particularly if they try to hold that expression for the entire shoot.  Darlings: you're lovely, but that's not the way to look scary.


  1. My favorite part of Poorly Dressed Dominatrix is when a picture there really pushes your button, then you read the mocking caption and you get that rush of shamed excitement for clicking with the "poorly dressed" image. Some of us older, somewhat jaded kinksters need that charge at times... :)

    1. Yes, I get that too. As I said, I do rather like the slightly tacky, tarty look. In part that's probably because I don't actually like too much realism in my femdom, truth be told. Also, there's an implied contempt for the viewer which I find perversely erotic. Or - to combine the two explanations in one - 'because I'm fucked up'. But aren't we all, really?

      Welcome back to blogging! More dodgy OWK videos please...

  2. First, thanks for mentioning my Tumblr. It started as an April Fool hmjoke a few years ago, and some people asked if I would continue it.

    As to Declan's point: yes, sometimes we older, jaded kinksters click with certain images. What I try to do is take a step back and see how amusing (if not ridiculous) some of those tropes can be.

    But good lord, the poorly crafted captions are the posts that really send me over the edge.

    1. A pleasure. You know, I hadn't actually connected the Tom Allen who comments here and the witty author of Tiresome Tropes. But then I've always been a bit dim like that.

      In a way, it's a shame the three blogs are aware of one another. What a triumph it would be to publish an illiterate caption to a tiresome trope posed by a poorly dressed dominatrix, and have it independently selected to be republished on all three.

      One thought. If, by republishing tiresome overused tropes you've created a blog that is fresh and different, isn't that something of a paradox? Might there be a trope that is the most tiresome and overused in all of femdom - and therefore, as the uniquely worst image ever published, rather interesting and exciting?

      Or not. (There's a reason I get slapped in the face a lot in session, you know.)

  3. LOL - I have several Tumblr accounts, but I don't make a point of crossing the streams. Tiresome Tropes posts get republished via Twitter, so some people do know it's me. Plus, I started the April Fool idea on my Edge of Vanilla blog.

    It would be funny to see the same post savaged by all three bloggers independently, but I'm really glad that you found us. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who does some heavy eye-rolling. And yes, while I do find some of them attractive, anyway, I can certainly poke fun at our liking of things that, when you stop to think, don't really make sense.