Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Extra service

Hello, Business Answers?  Natalie speaking. How can I help?

No, this isn’t actually the Chesham AB Nursery.  We’re a business answering service.  The person you’re trying to contact… errr ‘Nanny Stern’?  She’s busy so she’s switched all calls to us.  But I have a menu here I can take you through to try to process your call, if that’s any help at all?

An appointment?  Sure.  Tuesday week… not looking good.  Maybe Thursday?  Thursday.  4 – 6 pm OK for you?

Fine… now I need to take some details for the booking.  Do you have a customer code?  Got it.  Right – there you are.  Mr Franks, yes?

So…last time, you had… let’s see.  Bedwetting, smacked bottom and nappy humiliation?  That OK for you this time too?

Fine.  Well that’s all booked for you.  Thursday week, 4pm.

Now, Mr Franks, as you’re on the line, I wonder if I could talk to you about insurance on behalf of one of our other clients?  You see, these days many people don’t properly provide for – 

Mr Franks?  I’m sorry, I don’t think I heard that, I - 

Mr Franks?

Mr Franks?

Well, that was a bit rude.

Insurance…let’s see, we’ll call that ‘unsure’.

And back with Chesham AB Nursery, let’s see what we can do about that rude word shall we Mr Foulmouth Franks? … Hmm…  ‘mouthsoaping’. Perfect.  Oooh: caning too!  Well, why not?  How many?… oh I don’t know. Why’s it all in sixes?  12.  No, let’s have 24.

And we’ll schedule a follow-up call about the insurance for the day after.


Hello, Business Answers?  Natalie speaking. How can I help?

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