Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Wow, it just kept getting bigger...and longer...

So...this started out as a caption.  But somehow it grew and grew.

Lines of responsibility

Unsatisfied with your performance, by the look of it

"I know you’ve been on management training courses before, Mr Halford, but I’m confident you’ll see a real difference to your performance after this one.  It’s a completely new management training technique.
Now I’ve written a sentence down here: “Every day, I must strive to do my very best at work, carrying out the instructions of my boss to the best of my ability, giving her no cause to complain of laziness, rudeness or disobedience on my part.”
Isn’t that a motivational sentence?  Imagine how you could succeed if you have that running through your head every minute of the day!
Now here’s what we do.  There’s a pile of paper on your desk, there.  Now I want you to take the pencil and write the number “one” then write out the sentence.
Shall I read it again for you?
“Every day, I must strive to do my very best at work, carrying out the instructions of my boss to the best of my ability, giving her no cause to complain of laziness, rudeness or disobedience on my part.”
Good.  Now write the number “two” and do it again.
OK.  Now do you see what we’re doing?  Yes, that’s right.  Now you’re going to keep going until you’ve reached number 200, OK?  And I want you to do it all in one go, so no getting up from the desk, no speaking at all.  If you make a mistake in writing out the line, I want you to draw a neat line through it and write it again.  If you have to make more than three crossings-out on any one page,  throw that page away and start it again.  Off you go.
No, I said no talking please, Mr Halford.  That’s quite important for the exercise to work.  When you’ve finished, or if your pencil breaks, I want you just to raise your hand and sit quietly.
Two hours later
Finished?  Excellent.  Well, you can get up and bring me your papers.
Now while I’m looking through it, we’re going to try an exercise in mental visualisation.  I want you to stand over there in the corner, facing the wall.  No, a little closer.  Your nose should be nearly touching.  That’s right.  Now put your hands on your head.  I want you to visualise the sentence in your mind, as you remain in that position until I tell you to stop.  See if you can see it floating in space on the blank wall in front of you.  If I leave the room, you should remain in that position.
An hour later
Right, Mr Halford.  I think we’re making excellent progress.  Come and stand over here.  You can keep your hands on your head.  Now I counted nine crossings-out in your written work, and I see you discarded one page, so I suppose that’s another four, making 13 errors in all.  And you also spoke when I’d instructed you to remain silent, so let’s call that another 10, making 23 in all.  I’m going to round that up to 24.
Now we come to the really innovative part of this training.  It’s a completely new approach to motivational training.  I am going to make you feel very sorry for each and every one of those 24 errors.  Can you guess how?
No, it’s not that.  Not even close.  Go to that drawer over there and bring me what’s inside it.  Yes, that.  Do you know what that is?  No, it’s nothing to do with cooking.  It’s a motivational instruction tool.  I’ll show you how it works…

Plenty of motivation here

Half an hour later still
Right, Mr Halford, I think we’re done here for the day.  You might want to tuck your shirt a bit more neatly back into your trousers before you go back to your office.  That’s better.
Did you find that motivational?  Yes, it is rather isn’t it? It’s simple, but amazingly effective.
But it only works if you keep it up.  Now the great thing about this technique is you don’t have to be an expert trainer to do it.   I’ve got a name here – Janine O’Brien? – oh, she’s your secretary?  Right.  Super.
No, no, she’s not going on a course like this Mr Halford!  This is only for senior managers.  No, Janine is booked on a motivational instructor training course this week.  So she’ll be able to deliver the weekly modules of your training programme.  Isn't that great?  It’s best to agree a single time – Thursday at 6pm or suchlike – and just stick to it.  She’ll be tracking your performance at work too.
Oh, don’t look so worried, I’m sure she’ll pick it up in no time.  She’ll be watching the video of today’s session, at the start of her course, so she’ll know exactly what to expect.  We usually find that secretaries love taking on these additional tasks, and really put everything they’ve got into it.  Anyway, she’ll send me weekly reports.

Janine.  Isn't she sweet?

Then you’ll come back here from time to time for a refresher course.  And there are quite a few other things we haven’t tried too."

Friday, November 25, 2011

Feeling her pain

Oh, you will.

Does my bottom look caned in this?
He should be more sensitive.  Fortunately, parts of him are, so she can start working on those.

Money slavery
It can't be for clothes, because she buys them for you.  And you're not allowed alcohol or cigarettes.

Beaten senseless...again
She calls it "head-spanking".  Isn't that cute?

Americans call it a trunk I understand
Of course, it's just possible they'll take a bit longer than an hour.  So - best to stop all that frantic banging and wriggling about.

Just a trim please
Won't your wife be pleased when you get home and show her?

Monday, November 21, 2011

Influencing skills

These ladies have them.

Not a foot fetish
Oooh!  Oooh!  I don't have a foot fetish either Ma'am!  Oh dear, Pleeeease don't make me lick your dirty feet clean Ma'am!

Misery is underrated
Still, he's lucky to be inside in weather like this.  Best half-hour of the day.

Smoking domme POV oh my!
Hmmm.  How are we going to resolve this?

The drugs don't work
And don't think she's impressed when you buy the extra-large condoms, either.  She knows they're not for you.

Femdom wife finds happiness in marriage
You've made her very happy today.

Friday, November 18, 2011

The importance of terror in a healthy relationship

Often undervalued, don't you think?  It's the chill of fear striking deep into my stomach, as I watch the minute hand creep closer to the appointed hour, the hesitancy with which I approach the door and the tremble in my hand as I reach out for the doorbell that - for me - makes it more than just another way of getting bruises.



Domina takes all the money
Don't be fooled by that severe exterior.  She's actually a very kind person.  Why did you know, she gives 20% of all your money to animal charities?

Domme schoolgirl becomes domme grownup
Of course, she'll need training.  The Headmistress reckons that Mr Jones, the maths teacher, might be available to assist.

Zapped slave
Apparently, the new one has voice recognition.  You have to train it to recognise your voice, though.  So you say "Clean the floor." If it doesn't do it - press the red button to zap its balls.  Then repeat the command.  It's quite uncanny how accurate and responsive it can become.

Raoul's back
That Raoul has always had a wicked sense of humour. Remember that time he told her you'd called her a bitch? 

Superior wisdom
What a lucky man you are that someone so attractive takes the trouble to despise you.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Should men have the vote?

Not such an obvious question as you might imagine.  Yes, on the one hand, obviously women should make all the decisions.  But in our present, highly imperfect society, dominant wives effectively get two votes and owners of stables of slaves get a whole bunch.

I'm actually really interested in politics, myself.  I like to watch all the debates, and sort out the issues in my mind, as it helps me guess which party my Significant Other is likely to tell me to vote for.

Here we go again - femdom captions all right for you?  Lovely.

Last fancy dress party, she wore her leather outfit and you wore that little maid dress.  The time before she went as a strict schoolteacher and you as a schoolboy.  It's just as well your parents don't know anything about this stuff, or they might begin to see a pattern and stop inviting you.

Femdom wife appreciates it when you fuck off and leave her alone
As you've probably discovered by now, the world is full of beautiful women who really want you to fuck off.  I find that usually I know that without them even needing to tell me any more.  It's a Mars/Venus thing, really.

I think the club has a special lapel-pin you can wear.

She probably won't actually tell him, in order to avoid panic.  If he needs to know, he'll know.

Sold into slavery...again!
Isn't she pretty?  Don't pictures like this make you feel you don't deserve even to be scraped off the sole of her shoe?

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Another rather unimaginative headline featuring femdom captions

With a big hello to search engines from all over.

Now, after a headline like that, I suppose there had better be some captioned images of female domination, hadn't there?

But also more enjoyable for her.  There's always an upside.

Look away now please
So with this one I - ow! - excuse me, I was just - OOH! - I'm sorry, I really...ohhhh that hurts!...need to move on to the next.  No caption here.

Lesbian tease
OW!  No better!

It still rhymes with hickory switch
Right.  Think calm thoughts.  It's funny - we give our cat the stuff in tins as a treat, and the dry biscuity stuff for normal food.  So when my wife makes me eat the contents of one of the tins, I guess both me and the cat are unhappy about it.

Be afraid of your wife
Isn't it an awful feeling?  When you just know you're going to have an argument. But all arguments end, you know that too.  And you'll be a better husband for it, after all.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

No means no

Something too few men understand.  When a woman says no, that's just what she means.  No you can't stay out late.  No you're going to stay down there until I come.  No, not after your behaviour this month.  No, you signed the contract and that's that.  That sort of thing.  Get used to it.

Domme with a heavy wooden paddle
For some reason, that particular paddle is called "Angela".  She might call you at work, to let you know that Angela's going to be coming around that evening, that kind of thing.

You can lead a slave to Mistress but you can't errr
It's nice to know there's someone to pop in to feed them, if need be, so you don't need to leave them any use of their hands when you're away for a week or two.

Nurse with a cane intends to cure you
You're allowed to discharge yourself, you know.  You just need to fill out a form.  You have to ask her for one.  And a pen.

The two beautiful stepsisters
It was such a relief to their mother, whose arm used to get quite tired in the first days of their marriage.

Your birthday only comes once a year
It's a bit like being a kid again, isn't it?  Those feelings of longing and anticipation for months before...and then it's not exactly what you wanted, or it just doesn't turn out as expected?  Still, being able to deal with these feelings is what makes us grown-ups, right?

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Blessed art thou among women

There seems to be a discontinued Christian blog, that had the same name as this one.  I occasionally like to run headlines like that, to make a few minds explode.

Rather naughty, I know.  Fortunately, it seems I'll be getting a beating quite soon, so there will be penance.

More sinful pictures below:

Riding ladies with horsewhips...yum
Bet you're glad you didn't look at their bottoms, aren't you?  Oh.  Oh dear.

OWK ladies love to starve you
Actually, the way the ones who are already thin react to the starvation diet can be even funnier.

NO escape from the domme
Come on - don't be such a baby!  It's not as if she hasn't whipped you before!

Over her lap yet again
My favourite place.

Anne gives you a faceslapping
Another little service you can do for her.