Damned lies and sadistics

 

Guys need to be kept busy, preferably with female oversight, or their attention wanders. There's no one right way to do it.  It could be anything from meticulous housework for that one special lady, through scrubbing the pavements as part of a community-run cleaning squad all the way to five years of hard labour in a male re-education camp. It's all good.

 

 

 

If you can't afford a lovely sound-proofed dungeon and you want to enjoy the screams, just have a word with your neighbours.  Most will be perfectly happy with the noise, as long as you talk to them about it.  And you might even find a common interest!

 The lovely Mistress Mina Thorne, of course, about to show off her CBT skills.  I'd like to link to her web site but I am not at all sure that this is actually her, as I read somewhere she is retired, sin which case I'm afraid your C and B will just have to be T-ed by someone else.  Unless she isn't retired, in which case they won't.  I expect someone will know?

 

 

 

So you couldn't even save up a few weeks' pocket money?  No wonder she prefers Harold - I mean, apart from all the other reasons, obviously.

My SO was absolutely furious when I came home once with a prescription for painkillers. She said she felt it devalued the hard work she was putting into our marriage. It was very unfeeling of me, and I have to say I did feel very uncomfortable as a result, for a long time afterwards.

 

 

 

In-laws can take some getting used to and there's no harm in getting out of the occasional evening with a little white lie, especially if you spend that evening learning to be a better husband.

Indignity

Ah... furniture privileges.  I remember the first time my SO told me I wasn't allowed on the furniture any more and I cheekily asked if that included the whipping bench. How we laughed... or we would have done if I'd dared say it out loud.

Elbow-length latex gloves should come with a safety warning, in my view.  And latex gloves that cover the full length of the arm are just unsafe, no matter what the 'experts' might tell us about the length of the lower intestine.

See all the little gold rings on their toes?  Aren't they pretty?  They've got lots more gold rings, for you to wear, so maybe you'll look just as pretty too.  But they're not going on your toes, obviously.

If it'll help, the soaking wet towel she is planning to ram down your throat will taste quite soapy.

You might think that spousal abuse is neither funny nor sexy.  My wife disagrees, though: she loves it, so who am I to argue?

Boys will be toys

Maybe I'm just hungry... I expect she'd say that's because she's feeding me too often.

Lots of men find it quite hard to turn a woman on, sexually, but if you're ever lucky enough to meet a real hard-core sadist, you'll probably find that just doing whatever comes naturally pushes all her buttons in just the right way.

And she's having sex for both of you now, so it's quite a lot of work.

Nasty words can leave an unpleasant taste in the mouth.

Bob's shortlisted for an Oscar, I understand, now.  If he wins, I wonder if he'll put the credit where it is due in his acceptance speech?  Behind every successful man, they say...

When you're in a fix

just call for the men in tights!

Well... those are two of her spanking aprons, anyway.  She has more.

You never know when you'll need to do some sudden washing up in the middle of the night.

Hmm..  Turned out they don't have a vibrator at the reception desk, but they sent up a couple of their room service guys anyway and they were able to sort the problem out, so that was OK.  Pretty impressive customers service, I'd say.

Now you see that's just typical of my wife - she sends me out to buy the stuff but doesn't tell me what she wants it for!  Now I'm going to have to buy both - she hasn't heard the last of this, you know!

The magic's still there.

Chain keep us together, running in the shadow

Yes, it's another link to a music video with only the most spurious and tangential connection - if any - to the theme of this blog.  
 
That theme being, obviously, this:

He even scratched in the corner his tally of how many there are.  But you could wipe that off if you don't want spoilers.

He's going to have ever such a clean mouth. And a very respectful attitude too.

Hmmm. Looks like you're gettig that date rape after all!

Oh, it doesn't matter.  Mouth and anus - they're just two ends of the same tube. As my SO likes to point out: shit comes out of both and ocasionally needs to be shoved into both too, so why worry?

Awww.  Sweet.

Long to reign over us

Ymmmph.

Like many dommes, she's actually the kindest person you could ever meet.  Although she must know that the poor thing's probably already dead, she's going to pull and push and press and kick with all her might, if there's still a chance that could get it out unharmed.

Yes - useful tip there: it's a 'storage space'.  I went to the out of town furniture superstore and asked to see beds with an inbuilt cuckie closet and the saleswoman gave me ever such a funny look.  She took me to the right section, though, so I suppose that it was all right.  And she even let Raoul and my wife try the mattress out, so in the end it worked out quite well for everyone.

Yeah, lots of people say size doesn't matter but they're not the ones being used as pain-toys because it's all they're good for, now, are they?

 The glorious Gigi Allens, of course.  Is there a sadder phrase anywhere on the Internet than her self-description as a 'former professional dominatrix'?  Howl!

Actually, for me it was the maid's costume in that movie.  Mrrrow!

And all I do is kiss you through the bars of a cage

... well I would if you put your boot a little closer, anyway.


 

About that which we cannot speak, we must remain silent.

Dommes.. they're all about rules.

 This is the delightful Domina Liza.  I think I'd be happy in her cage forever, if I could see her dressed in green, setting off that stunning auburn hair, from time to time.

Regrets? He's had a few.  And he'll have plenty of time for a few more.

Well, he does need a new companion. Some might say the adventures would be a little dull, if he's never allowed out.  But I'd watch it.

If you know what this caption is about, you might also enjoy this.  Or you might not.

What do you mean, this one doesn't fit today's 'cage' theme?  Of course it does.  The cage isn't actually in the picture, because it hasn't been delivered yet.  But it'll be ready for you when you get back from honeymoon.

Normal service

Right, after that little April interlude, this blog will return to its usual subject matter.  Or 'object matter' when male submissives feature in the pics.

I don't really 'get' maledom anyway, to be honest.  I mean, I can just about see that it could be quite sexy to have an attractive woman all tied up, available for any sexual act of my choosing.  I could iron one of her skirts, for example, or tidy her tights drawer even if what she really wanted was to be brought a cup of tea or have the garage cleared out. The thought of that kind of power's quite a turn on.  But what's the point of my being turned on if if she's completely helpless in the bondage - she can't remove my chastity belt with her hands tied, can she?  In any case, how can I decide what I want to do if she's gagged and can't tell me?  See, I just think maledoms haven't really thought it all through.

Oh well. Here are some things I do understand, dimly at least.

Ah, yes, the purest form of male submission: not even daring to irritate her with your presence.  I find women really appreciate it when I do that.

Then, bruised and bloody, the winner gets to have a heavy BDSM session.  Quite a day.

But you have to book.  And until you're a 'regular' you'll need to pay a deposit in advance. No exceptions - sorry.

I'm sure she respects us really.  It's a kind of harsh femdom persona she puts on. She's really good at it, don't you think?

 This is of course the lovely Gigi Allens, whose boots I am not fit to lick, and whose name I don't even know how to pronounce. Hard g, soft?  One of each?

The pre-marital agreement also refers to 'objectionable conduct' so don't even think of arguing - that's a red flag right there.

Hmm. Have I posted hat last one before? I have a system for this blog to avoid that, with 'posted' and 'unposted' folders (over 1000 captioned images presently in the latter, so this blog will be here for a while!  Keep coming back.) Unlike the Tumblr site, where I just randomly post previously bloggered images, so there's repetition from time to time (2700 now posted, though, so it doesn't happen often! Keep going back - although there is nothing there that has not been here so I don't really understand why people do).  Still, the above looks awfully familiar.  Oh well, have an extra one:

Oops. My bad.

A facility for correction

This wonderful lady certainly has one.  Thank You, my Lady.

'Dainty'.  Isn't that a nice word?  All dainty down there.  And kinda cute.

 

Oh - and for the orgasm shots they use a body double. 

 

Fortunately, all my girlfriends assured me that I never suffered too much from that particular complaint.

 

Are you going to let her order you about like that? Are you?  Well?

 

 

Funny, that, because it always tastes exactly like soap.

Gyneolatry

An interesting word I found recently, that means pretty much what you'd expect it to mean really.  And it's very, very much what this blog is all about.

Mostly "love, honour and obey" covers it, but she has expanded the "obey" part, providing a bit more detail.  Well - quite a lot more, actually.

I'd tell you what the word was, but I'm nearly out of soap myself.

Always an optimist, that Orwell.

Not that it did Fred any good in the long run.

Men can be so unreasonable.  Alice accepted the compromise after only a few hours discussion.  She's not happy, but she's prepared to accept it.